August 4: Toilet Paper Goose

Saturday, August 4, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 2:23 PM
Given to Allie from Lynn.
Dave Matthews: "Hike up your skirt a little more
and show your world to me."
I like today's gift for its dignity.  Recently, I was shopping at Bed, Bath & Beyond and saw those ostentatious spare toilet paper roll holders--usually comprised of a basic stainless steel base and shaft that fits three rolls.  You put one of those in the corner of your bathroom and you've basically got a billboard in there that says, "Hey, um, well if you're going to poop a lot at my house, here are the spares.  Be kind."  I can see the need for one spare roll--I won't even question that.  But when that shaft is only showing two spares, is there a need to keep it stocked at the maximum three?  If that's the case, I feel sorry for the bottom roll who will wait a very long time until its life purpose can be fulfilled.

This goose holder has room for only one and blends elegantly in most any bathroom.  It was made by nuns (Lynn's sister is a nun).

Crikey! I'm no gramma!
Allie
-Profession: College student

-Favorite Olympic sport: Gymnastics

-The HMS Alexandra was a 19th century British battleship.  What was their least favorite ration on board?:  Stale bread

-Which one of these things is not like the other: Alley McBeal, Ali G, alley cat, or Ali Baba?:  Ali Baba because I don't like it.  Baba means grandma in Russian and I'm not a grandma.

-You enjoy speaking through a variety of accents, including British, Scottish, Irish, Australian, Chinese French, Indian, country, and New Yorker.  Can you tell me a few situations where you use the accents interspersed in your daily life?:
-1) some professors I mimic (British, Indian, Chinese)
-2) when things go wrong, I'll say in a British accent, "Bloody Hell!" or "What on Earth?"
-3) my lab partner and I will have elevator conversations with any of them
-4) I make some prank calls with them