July 9: Rick Bayless Mexican Serving Dish

Tuesday, July 10, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 1:09 AM
Given to Kyle from Cathy.
Kyle's remark: "Great, now I've got a place for my tacos!"
Mind Your Meter 
A tragi-comedy in four short acts based on actual events


Cast:
Kyle....as himself, the current parking attendant
Dan....as myself, a day laborer
Angela Merkel....as Angela, the previous parking attendant
Ricky Ricardo....as Ricky, a day laborer who works with Dan

Act I:
Ricky: I don't need to park my car here all day.  I'm just lazy and want a shorter walk to my office.
Angela: No problem, Ricky!  Stay as long as you want!

Later that day...
Dan: I've got to drop off these large, cumbersome packages to my office.  It should take me about 10 minutes.  Is it okay if I park in the end spot where all the trash is accumulating?
The Joker got away again!
Angela:  You can pull in there.  Make sure you put your money in the meter.

Act II:
Dan: I'm having an emergency.  I really need to use the bathroom.  Can I run in and use it?
Angela: You can pull in.  Make sure you put your money in the meter.

Act III:
Dan: I'm having Ricky Ricardo's baby!!  I'm having contractions!!  This baby is coming out!!!
Angela:  You can pull in.  Make sure you put your money in the meter.

Act IV:
Several months have passed...
Dan: Do you mind if drop off these large lead weights to my office?
Kyle:  Yes, of course.  Pick any spot.  Those look heavy.  Here, let me give you a hand.

His employer has a work order
to make the inside padded
Kyle
-Profession: Information Attendant

-Favorite Jay-Z song:  Big Pimpin'

-Is there a dignified beauty of having every car in its place in a parking lot?:  Absolutely!  Some people park cock-eyed and that gets me angry.  No one will park next to them and then it throws off everything.  I tell people who have a problem not to take their parking frustration out on me.

-A kyle is a Scottish term for a straight--a narrow, typically navigable waterway that connects two larger bodies of water.  How would you traverse one?:  Either with a six-foot inflatable alligator raft or a refrigerator door, Tom Hanks Castaway style.

-After what period of time in the booth will you lose your marbles and become permanently unable to interact in society again?:  Yesterday?  Probably another eight months for me.  Please check back.