|Bob isn't shy in telling you how he really feels about these gifts|
I worked at Red Robin during college, serving and bartending the lovely patrons their bottomless fries and I'm-going-to-need-new-jeans-in-two-weeks/do-you-have-the-hospital's-address-in-our-GPS? burgers. I also remember accidentally serving my girlfriend an alcoholic milkshake when she had an upset stomach that eventually turned into the 24-hour flu. But what sticks out in my mind most is the family-friendly birthday song, which I'll share with you so you can be the hit of the next birthday party you go to. Begin by clapping in even beats.
Leader: I don't know what I've been told
Group: I don't know what I've been told
Leader: Someone here is getting old (don't sing this to Benjamin Button)
Group: Someone here is getting old
Leader: Good news is dessert's for free (Mama told me there are no free lunches in life)
Group: Good news is dessert's for free
Leader: Bad news is we sing off-key (then you correspondingly sing off-key)
Group: Bad news is we sing off-key (that's when the audience and birthday person really laugh)
Leader: Bring it on down
All: Happy Birthday...to YOU!
-Profession: Physical Therapist
-Favorite stench: My own
-A 'bob' is a weight at the end of a pendulum. What issue(s) have you gone back and forth on?: Religion and politics
-Alice and Bob are placeholder characters in cryptography and physics problems. While waiting, what are you and Alice doing?: Shooting the breeze...about religion and politics.
-B.O.B. has many meanings, including the Bank of Botswana. What do you think their free giveaway is for opening up a new checking account?: A fly swatter
-You're the 16th bearded gift exchanger. Are you jolly?: Oh yeah