December 16: "The Second City", "Everyone Poops", Incomplete State Quarters Collection and Book, and an Autographed Jessica Joy Headshot

Monday, December 17, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 12:59 AM
Given to Christine from Jessica Joy.

Talk about an action-packed prize bundle!  Jessica is a Second Citizen--hence the Second City book--and when I asked to her to find something to give, she thought the book was "taking up space" on her bookshelf; however, I think it was because she didn't want to admit to not being able to read.  Gift one--check.  Gift two features something we can all use--a book about pooping with brightly-colored illustrations of all sorts of animals (including humans) pooping.  If we ever doubted our unity on the planet and with nature, one breeze through this book outta do it.  It made me want to do my business out in the woods, topped off with a wipe with some oak leaves.

Lastly, we have an earnest attempt by Jess to collect all the state quarters that were issued between 1999 and 2008.  She has a bundle of them, save for seven of them.  There's a little section at the back that lists all the U.S. Presidents and a little blurb about each that's a little, hmmm, distorted.  Let's take the last line of each of the last three Presidents:

George Bush I: "His term ended on a high note with the U.S. invasion of Kuwait."
Bill Clinton: "In spite of scandals, Clinton's popularity rarely suffered, as the nation enjoyed a booming economy."
George Bush II: "Since the terror attacks of 9/11, he has enjoyed unprecedented popular support."

If I go back far enough, I'm sure there's something about the public enjoying the austerity measures that Hoover put into place as well.

-Profession: Exercise Physiologist

-Favorite stretch: Calf stretch

-You're an avid runner and cycler.  How would you compare doing them outside versus on a treadmill and stationary bike, respectively?:  Outside is like getting my employment papers in Afghanistan.  Inside is like playing Black Ops on an X-Box.

-Famous Dave's--the famous barbecue eatery--says on their website they've been knocking people's socks off for 25 years.  What kind of socks do you think they are?:  Tube socks

-You were Mr. Titan in high school for your athletic prowess.  Do you ever wear your varsity jacket around when you're feeling blue as a way to pick you up?:  No.  I think it's in the attic somewhere.