November 1: Ginormous Coffee Mug, 2 Finger Puppets and an Artistic Pendulum

Friday, November 2, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 8:41 AM
Given to Kendall from Chester.

With the birth of every child in the U.S., each get a social security number that will follow them around for the rest of their lives.  I don't think that's adequate, honestly, to prepare them for a life ahead in today's ever-changing, complex, uncertain world.

What I think hospitals should provide newborns is a legend for all of the different causes and their corresponding color and ribbon or flag shape.  Am I the only one who gets confused when they see a brick red colored wristband that represents searching for alien life, while a fire engine red wristband is representative for all people who've had neck replacement surgery?  Then a fire engine ribbon is for those people who enjoy geocaching.  I'm utterly and thoroughly confused at the whole mess.

-Profession: Alumni Relations phone expert; Swim Coach

-Favorite Excel Formula: =SUMif("y", yes, no)

-In geography, there is a Kendall basin, island, mountain, river and terrace (for a volcano).  What is next?:  Peninsula.  I like being surrounded by water on three sides like I do when I'm swimming.

-Now you have a problem on your hands with your large coffee mug.  What would be your five step program to quitting caffeine?:
1) Admittance
2) Seek Help
3) Remove from the area
4) Family/Friend Support
5) Tylenol

-Kendall 32 is a fiberglass cruising sailboat that was made in the 1960s.  Half of the 830 that were made were sold as kits.  Where might an enthusiast buy a bottle large enough to put their ship in?:  Texas--'cause everything's big in Texas.