October 17: Hardhat Stress Ball

Thursday, October 18, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 2:06 AM
Given to Matt from Derrin.

I've got eight stress balls lining the metal railing that outlines my desk.  They came to me through a combination of boredom and orneriness.  As a side perk with my job, I get a bunch of product catalogs that showcase items companies can put their logo on.  I flipped open a page that said the company would offer to send me free samples of any item.  [insert evil laugh]  I asked them for four different stress relievers two summers ago and then ordered four others this past summer. 

I also have asked for samples of pint glasses, pins--I had a random collection of them, including "Princeton Theological Seminary, 2011-12 Madison, WI School District, and I'm a Nursing Cowboy, among others--and pens. 

-Profession: Video Production

-Favorite time of day to nap: 2:00 p.m.

-Nightlife is important to you and your wife.  What would daylife be for people getting off third shift?:  They should have a few drinks and turn it into nightlife.  There are bars open...bars you probably don't want to go to, but there are some open.  That would be like crossing over into different worlds--people getting a beer while people are going to a diner.  The beer people would be getting all social, while the others would be waking up.

-'Girls are nice like sugar and spice' goes the saying.  You have a wife and two daughters.  Tell us if they're more like sugar or spice and which kind.
-Wife: Brown sugar.  That kind of sugar's not used as much, but it's there and important.  She's quiet, but she knows what's going on with me without even saying anything.
-Daughter #1: Caramelized sugar.  She's a goof like me, but she's also compassionate.  She doesn't like watching America's Funniest Home Videos or the bad characters in Disney movies because she's worried about the people getting hurt or doesn't like people being mean [respectively].  It's kind of like that layer you can't get through, but she's soft and sweet underneath.
-Daughter #2: White sugar.  She's always smiling and brings happiness to us all.

-No one has driven one of your cars after you've owned it; they've all gone to the junkyard.  What item from each car would you salvage?:
-Plymouth Reliant K car: the frame
-'86 Buick Century: car alarm. That sounded like a cop car's--I got someone pulled over with it once.
-'87 Chevy Cavalier: hatchback.  I lived in that car and all my clothes were in the h-back.
-'92 Ford Ranger: stick shift
-'99 Hyundai Elantra: the gray side mirrors (on a maroon-colored car)
-'01 Chevy Cavalier: speakers.  I only had that car six months before it got totaled; the speakers were nice.