May 25: A Happy Pocket Full of Money and The S.U.C.C.E.S.S. Approach DVDs

Friday, May 25, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 11:13 PM
Given to Sarah from JW.
Is that your pocket full of money
or are you just happy to see me?
Here are two of JW's projects--The SUCCESS Approach (sorry, I didn't have the patience to put all those periods in there a second time) is about autism.  And A Happy Pocket Full of Money was a project that grew out of a web book that JW found and narrated and turned into a kick-ass media sensation about how you can create your own wealth.  I've been investing heavily in trombone manufacturing over the last few years, but it might be time for me to reconsider that strategy.

Speaking of money, have you ever thought about what would happen to you if you got caught with a counterfeit bill?  You didn't make the bill, but say someone gives it to you because it's been in circulation and no one knew that it was counterfeit until you paid for something and someone checked it and found that it wasn't any good.  I've heard of news stories where the police will arrest someone for having such a bill.  Most people are so concerned about what they'll say to the police if they get pulled over for a speeding ticket, but they don't think about this.  I think use the same excuse that you have to use the bathroom really bad.

But if the police test you and say prove it, then you could get slapped with an additional public indecency citation, which is not good.  And if you're not peeing, then that's even worse because now you're a liar, too.  Maybe you should say you have a kidney stone!  Yes!  No one can argue with that and most people will give you that.  Yes!  Kidney stone is your excuse for speeding tickets, counterfeit money, breaking up, being late for Thanksgiving, the change in the seasons, and anything else you want to get out of and want sympathy for.

-Profession: Non-profit administration

-Favorite balloon animal: Giraffe

-You'll be riding in a 'Critical Mass' bike race where hundreds of bikers will ride around the city en masse.  Are you worried about being kicked in the face?:  It's definitely a concern, yes.

-You speak fluent French.  Out of curiosity, do the French have the expression, "...that the Americans call a certain 'I don't know what'":  Je ne sais pas.

-When you're going out to a restaurant, at what number do you think the server should cap off the number of available salad dressing choices?:  7.  I feel the same way about shampoos and toothpastes.  There are too many choices.