June 12: Cartman Plush Doll

Wednesday, June 13, 2012 - Posted by 366 White Elephants at 12:52 AM
Given to Clara from Sarah.
I got the 'stink eye' from another clerk when I placed him
on the scale
From grades 1-8, my family sold Malley's (where Clara works) crisped rice and almond candy bars as a fundraiser for the grade school I attended.  And every year, our family came in first place for the greatest number of candy bars sold.  Some years, such as in 1992, we beat out the Rotkowski family by eight bars--800 to 792--where other years we smoked the second place laughers by 300 bars or more.  The top prize was $200 every year that none of us kids saw, but likely went to new brake pads on my dad's Chevy Malibu or new shears for the living room windows.

Over those eight magical years, our family bought a few bars to eat.  On the back of the wrapper was a coupon to Buy One Hot Fudge Sundae, Get One Free.  Well, we have a stack so tall that if I used all of them consecutively, Wilford Brimley and I would be having a heart-to-heart about diabeetus.  When I bring friends to Malley's for some ice cream treats and use the BOGO (I love that acronym) coupons, I insist on sitting on the merry-go-round that my aunt claims gives her motion sickness.  I don't feel the sensation of losing my lunch, but I can only take it for about an hour 10 tops, then I've gotta split like a banana.

"They should cover Wilford Brimley
in chocolate!"
-Profession: Candy Store Manager

-Favorite dog trick: Sit up and Beg

-What's the next best thing covered in chocolate?:  Turkey

-Do you feel an urge to brush your teeth a lot?:  I have a sweet tooth, but eat candy in moderation.  I probably have three malt balls a day.  I brush my teeth 3x a day at the minimum, and then a couple of times in between that.

-What was your first car?: A 1959 black Ford Galaxie.  Boy was that a nice car.